That’s the question I asked myself before I published my new short story collection by the same name, Everyday Psychopaths. There’s something fascinating about people going crazy and doing unpredictable things. Crazy people are all around us and there’s at least a little bit of crazy in all of us.
Being crazy or a psychopath are of course loose terms that are hard to define. People tend to throw them around without any medical examinations to back them up. But if you google/wiki the word the following definition comes up:
Psychopathy is a personality or mental disorder characterized partly by antisocial behavior, a diminished capacity for remorse, and poor behavioral controls. As a diagnostic category in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, psychopathy has been replaced by antisocial personality disorder (ASPD).
Surely, most people don’t see it exactly like that when they hear the word “psychopath”, but the “diminished capacity for remorse” is pretty much spot on.
In Everyday Psychopaths you find three stories, all with some level of psychopath in them. They’re full of dark humor and best described with the line:
[symple_highlight color=”yellow”]Everyday Psychopaths is a collection of short stories that will both frighten you and make you laugh out loud. Warning: reading these three stories can make you sound like a crazy person. Kind of like an Everyday Psychopath…[/symple_highlight]
The stories in Everyday Psychopaths:
A Killer Date
This is a horror story written with portion of humor. Inspired by Stephen King. Here you find the most obvious use of an Everyday Psychopath.
30 minutes into the date, Sheila thinks there’s magic in the air between her and Terry. She can hardly believe her luck to have met a man who seems to have everything. She wants to pinch her arm and ask herself if it’s too good to be true, but if she did the answer would be: Yes, it is too good to be true, because the truth is actually horrifying…
Quotes from A Killer Date:
Terry loved relaxed candlelight dinners and red wine. It was a nice contrast from work and killing people.
“You are so beautiful, I could eat you,” he said.
And it was true. Her smile was as intoxicating as the wine.
And he could eat her.
“You have really nice teeth,” Terry said and thought they could be excellent for his collection of exquisite human body parts.
The Development Talk
In the Development Talk you find Jasper who’s up for his yearly development talk. Jasper hates meetings and he hates them even more now that his new manager is Stephen – a classic everyday psychopath.
Quotes from The Development Talk:
“He was a strange mix of Heinrich Himmler and Barney the Dinosaur.”
“A perfectionist,” Stephen repeated. On his lips the word seemed to taste of excrement.
He gave Jasper a look of…yes what was that look? Amusement, malice or constipation?
The Worst/Best Day of My Life
Joe hasn’t had the best time lately. His life seems to be going steadily downwards – at least if you asked him. When his hated colleague Mary Pedersen (everyday psychopath!) steals the promotion he thought he was going to get, things get even worse. And sometimes things has to get a lot worse before they get better.
Quotes from The Worst/Best Day of My Life:
I guess all my afternoon beers and burgers were catching up with me, which made me want to scream THEN WHY NOT MY HAIR!?
No matter how many tapes of whale sounds I listened to, I made Hitler look like a Woodstock survivor.
That casserole tasted like mashed-up sewage rat and I knew I couldn’t force that down one more time, even if it was chased by a pint of beer.
And to top the collection off I’ve included generous samples of The Wake-Up Call and Hollywood Ass. where both womanizing, workaholic, narcissist Jack Reynolds and Hollywood A-list actress B possess excellent everyday psychopath qualities.
I hope you like my little tribute to everyday psychopaths. May we never become like them.