This sounds obvious, doesn’t it? Still we do it. I do it, I bet you do it, I bet your mother does it – we’re so afraid of being disappointments and failures we go out of our way to please the people around us. This sometimes include people who don’t deserve this AT ALL. This could involve your boss, your partner, your kid, your friends. If you feel your relationship with that person is 80-20%, where you put in 80% effort and the other puts in a fourth of that, then something needs to change.
I’m in a period of reading a lot. Well, I always read a lot, but currently I’m both reading fiction and “self-help” books. Why I put quotation mark around self-help? It’s because I think that term has kind of a negative weight to it, because there’s too much self-help crap out there. What I’m reading is more personal stories with some advice thrown into them.
It’s different for everyone I guess, but for most it would equal freedom, health, have people to love and be loved back, have a job and possibly a hobby you like, and to feel purposeful.
But we often get muddled up in a chase after something we think is happiness. Mostly it’s about money or things related to money, a promotion at work, winning the local curling club championship, or trading on the stock exchange to make an extra buck. We believe that this promotion, new object or title will bring us closer to being truly happy.
Yeah, don’t blame me, don’t blame the government, don’t blame your parents, don’t blame your religion, don’t blame bad luck, don’t blame anyone.
And don’t blame yourself either. Shit happens (if shit has happened) so let’s get over it before we start smelling from it.
One of my favorite books on writing (aptly named “On Writing“) is written by Stephen King and in that book he regurgitates and then chews on one of the most common rules for writing; write what you know.
First time I read it it made a helluva lot of sense. I mean, it does sound damn difficult to write about space when you have spent all of your life with your feet planted firmly on the ground. Yet, if you can’t write about what you like, doesn’t it take away the fun of it? The reason you write is because it’s fun, right? Then it doesn’t make sense to write about accounting or plumbing (because honestly that doesn’t sound very exciting for a plot).
(Well you could probably do something more productive than reading this very long post so…)
Yeah, this is another installment in my humble advice series. I call it humble because I believe someone’s about to comment “who the fuck are you to give people advice about this and that, you don’t know jack shit!” but maybe that’s just some small spark of internet forum fear (people seem to find it easier to be rude on the internet than face to face, gee, I wonder why?).
It does. You betcha.
It doesn’t matter if you dress sharply, look sloppy, smell bad, forget your tie when everybody else has one, pick your nose in meetings, and so on – it WILL make an impact. Someone might think, hmmm…this guy/ girl is…weird, smelly, good-looking, seems to be in control, elegant, ugly, skinny, fat, interesting or disgusting. People will think something and you can affect what they think of you. If you think you can’t, you’re in trouble.
Oh, crap, I’m in a preaching mode…
The Wake-Up Call philosophy is about re-evaluation, about looking at yourself and asking yourself where you are in your life and where you would want to be.
It’s good to have a regular wake-up call. It’s nice to smell the coffee. It’s educating to read the writing on the wall. To pinch yourself once in a while. Hard.